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Showing posts from 2017

A Reflection: My first year as a mum

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So as my little boy's first birthday approaches (5 days to go to be precise ) I’ve found myself overwhelmed with different emotions…Where has the year gone? Am I a good mum? I’m asking myself so many questions and the truth is…I don’t know the answer to any of them. It seems like yesterday I was sat in the corner of the bathroom on the floor with a positive test in my hands shaking and freaking out (little did I know about all of the complications I was due to face with my pregnancy).
I blinked and my pregnancy was over, one minute I was being prepped for an emergency C section at 27 weeks…the next I was having a healthy 8lb 11 due date baby, and now he’s turning 1?! Where has the time gone? There is so much I’ve learned over the past year and I feel there is so much I’m yet to learn because nothing prepares you to be a parent, I read all the books, took all the advice I was given but yet I was still sat at the end of my hospital bed scared with not a s…

Things to remember when you fall out of love with someone you thought you’d love forever.

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Things to remember when you fall out of love with someone you thought you’d love forever. 
Your worth hasn’t decreased due to their inability to see how valuable you are. Whether they’ve dropped a diamond whilst flicking through pebbles or they’ve neglected the best thing that’s ever happened to them- it is their problem and not yours! Your ability to love so relentlessly, passionately and fearlessly is a strength. Not a weakness. You have SO MUCH to give. Never let anybody tell you any different. Try to let go of the hurt. Holding onto it is only hurting you. Easier said than done, but whilst you’re replaying scenarios- they probably can’t even remember the half of the struggles they’ve caused you! You will love again. It seems impossible, but you will. You have no idea of who or what could be around the corner for you. You have no idea of the love and adoration you might find it you just let yourself try. Celebrate all of the good things you’ve done togethe…

Mental Health Monday: PND and bonding

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Having trouble bonding with your newborn isn't something limited to those experiencing PND - it actually happens to most mums after giving birth, and is a common part of the "baby blues". There's an expectation that everything will be wonderful and magical, but in actual fact your body has gone through an immensely traumatic experience, and for the next 2 or 3 months you will be sleep deprived beyond belief. It's no wonder that sometimes the bonding isn't automatic, or just takes a little longer.

Immediately after I gave birth to my daughter she was placed on my tummy for skin-to-skin, recommended to keep baby warm and to benefit baby straight after leaving the security of the womb. She stayed there for all of 10 seconds before I had to ask someone to move her. I had been throwing up throughout labour and was still being sick into a paper bowl, shaking too much to hold her properly. 
After that I didn't hold her very much, exce…

6 tips to help your toddler through a cold

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Winter is here and it brought my son the gift of a snotty nose and a sore throat. Toddlers end up suffering colds so badly because they don't understand what is happening and they can't dose up on cold and flu medicine.
1. Honey and lemon This classic cold remedy is brilliant once your little one is over a year old.  If they are under one year old this is isn't suitable because honey contains Clostridium Botulinum. Paired with their immature guts, there is a (very low) risk of them developing botulism.
The honey is good for sore throats because of its antibacterial and potentially antiviral properties and the lemon packs a nice punch of Vitamin C.

I struggled for ages to make it the right temperature quickly without making it taste gross. The answer? Frozen lemon. Buy a few lemons, quarter them and freeze them. Pop one or two slices into a hot water and honey mixture and wait a couple of minutes. Give them a little squeeze and voila! Perfect toddler …

How to entertain a toddler without spending a penny.

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I am so excited about Christmas. The tree has gone up early, I seem to have bought pretty much everything. I've planned some Christmas activities for my little one for the month of December. But what do you do when you don't want to give your toddler any new things to play with, because their toys are waiting in a cupboard to be wrapped, and you're living off a budget because your money has either been spent, or is going towards all the food and other bits and pieces your money disappears on at this time of year? The weather is also not enticing me to spend much time outside, even with layers on!

I've been coming up with some free activities to do at home with my toddler who is a bit bored of her usual toys. She had fun, so I wanted to share these activities with you. Let me know if you try any of them and please share your ideas with us, as we can give them a go before Christmas!

Music time.
Ok, I get it, you're probably thinking, why Ch…

Mental Health Monday: Speak Up

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Although we may have all spent our teenage years trying desperately to get away from embarrassing parents, parents are a class of people that we will all come across in everyday life. Hopefully, many of you reading this post are parents - mothers or fathers. It's so important to understand and raise awareness of not only maternal mental health but of parental mental health generally.


Particularly important is raising awareness in our workplaces, because of the progress that has been made towards diversity and equality across this sphere generally - though much still needs to be done. Gender equality is increasing and this progress cannot be undone by a lack of support or awareness of the issues faced by new mothers and fathers, who, of course, make up a significant proportion of our working population.

Work-related stress is something which has affected so many people, so it is increasingly crucial to make sure that parents have no further stress upon r…

Putting yourself first

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So one thing I’ve noticed recently is that, as mums, we rarely prioritise ourselves. We put everything before our wellbeing, seriously…even the washing comes before putting ourselves first and my question is why? Why is it “normal” to be over tired and under-appreciated…when did it become acceptable for mums to feel this way?

Personally, I believe that society has set such an unrealistic goal of “the perfect mum” and with constant derogatory remarks as to whether you’re a “stay at home mum” or a “working mum”, it makes sense that us mums aren’t looking after ourselves as much as we could be.
We are care givers first and foremost to our little ones, but how can we care for them when nowadays most mums are neglecting their own needs? Think about it, how many times have you sat down and had a drink and 5 minutes to yourself today? We need to put ourselves first to help give our little ones what’s best. It’s like running a car on empty.
Recently, I decided to …

Does social media make it harder to be good mothers?

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Since the evolution of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc., millions of parents have flocked to social media to show their family and friends pictures of their little ones, experiences they've had and problems they’ve encountered along the way. This may seem harmless, but picture this...

Mum one- Only posts on social media about the amazing things her child does, pictures of her child being perfectly behaved. Only shares experiences where she felt triumphant as a parent. Lives a seemingly perfect life with her perfect child. Meanwhile, her toddler has stressed her out all day, nothing has been done around her house and once her toddler has gone to bed, she gets to finally sit down to hot food for the first time today.

Mum two- Checks mum one's social media frequently, amazed at how well she is coping with motherhood. She scrolls through her social media posts in awe, as her toddler pulls out the clothes she has folded three times already and screams a…

Thinking about you...

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Thinking about you…The following words are a cliche, but I promise they’re all true…
I never really knew who I was, or what I wanted to be until the day I held you. At first, just your existence made me feel complete as you thrived from within my tummy. But since you’ve been born, I love you more every day. Nothing beats being your Mummy.  I don’t think that I’d ever be able to fully describe the adoration that I have for you. But my sweet girl, I hope I’ll be able to prove it, in all of the things I do.  Knowing that I managed to make something, so unbelievably perfect fills me with pride.  I know that being a mummy can be daunting, almost scary at times- but I’m loving my little tour guide.  Showing you off to the world makes me so proud, you’re so beautiful, so intricate, so clever and so chatty. I don’t know what I did to deserve such an incredible princess, but I’ve never been so happy.  Your toothy grin and your little laugh- everything you do, I comp…

Confession: I didn't enjoy pregnancy

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This is a topic that many mums shy away from, but I'm here to tell you all that it is perfectly okay to say that, for whatever reason, you didn't enjoy being pregnant.

Whenever I make this controversial admission, I'm always met by the question of "did you have a rough pregnancy, then?", or, from people who know me and saw me most days of the pregnancy, the concession "yeah but you did have a lot of sickness".

First of all, my pregnancy really wasn't that difficult. It was emotionally hard, as I was battling depression and anxiety, a number of personal issues, and leading a highly stressful life with little to no support network. But physically, it was quite an easy pregnancy. I had some morning sickness at odd points throughout the pregnancy, but really not a lot. Possibly the worst complaint I have of my pregnancy was that I had reflux for the entirety of the last trimester, which had me downing Gaviscon by the bottle, …

Top tips for mums planning a wedding and honeymoon

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Wedding

Last Tuesday I tied the knot and became a wife! Crazy, I know. At the ripe old age of 22, I have taken myself securely off the market... Sorry, lads.

The day was absolutely wonderful, and I am amazed with how well my darling 17 month old daughter coped with all the late nights and lack of sleep. However, having her around did make certain pre-wedding things slightly more stressful, so if you can learn from my experiences, I hope it makes it much easier for anyone else in the same boat!

1. Don't attempt dress fittings with clingy children...

For my final fitting before the big day, myself and 3 bridesmaids all had to get to the bridal shop for final tweaks and adjustments. You would think that, in this situation, there are enough bridesmaids to go around to entertain the little one while mummy had her fitting. Except 2 of them were 50 minutes late, with no explanation. This is more of a choose reliable bridesmaids tip than a parenting one, but the…

Is Santa Claus Damaging Children’s Mental Health?

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It’s a crazy concept, isn’t it? That our jolly Christmastime character could cause any harm at all. I have been thinking about this for some time now, although I am yet to implement operation Santa in my own home because my son is so young. This will be the first year for us and I am so excited to introduce the spark of magic but I am also very wary of starting down a road I’m not too sure I want to travel.
First and foremost, Christmas is a religious holiday and that should ALWAYS be respected and taught to children - they ought to know what they are celebrating.  Over the years that has taken a bit of a back seat for a lot of families but the values and spirit of Christmas remain unchanged. 
Now we are drawing closer to the festive season I am seeing more and more early birds on social media with their Christmas shopping already sorted. They have stacks and stacks of toys for their children and are posing questions like “Is this enough for my ___ year old?” …

Have you checked your lemons, melons or mangos? 

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As it is breast cancer awareness week, I thought i'd share my scare experience with our readers in the hope that it might encourage some of you to get checked out, if you're having any breast related worries!

A few months ago, I finally made the big step in getting myself checked out after having a boobie scare. Why am I telling you lucky lot about it?! Because changes to our breasts honestly need to be spoken about more!


How many of us ladies can honestly say that we check ourselves out frequently? When did you last check? I know that we're not quite as bad as the boys at checking ourselves... But I am very aware that I personally only ever used get round to doing it when I get reminded by online campaigns etc.

I saw the image above, on Facebook and decided that it was time to confront one of the changes I had noticed since having Florence nearly a year and a half ago. I knew that changes in your breasts and breast tissue was very common after …

What is this thing you call 'sleep'?

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Sleeping through the night... It is that one thing us parents all desire. Yet we still don't feel refreshed when we finally get it.

It quite simply seemed to me that my baby was the one and only child that wasn't sleeping through the night. Every parent I spoke to was telling me that their little angel was sleeping through.

I kept thinking come on! We can't be the only ones, surely? There must be someone out there who feels my pain!!

I know for certain that I didn't sleep through as a baby.
I know this because my mum likes to remind me of this constantly.
"You only stopped waking us in the night when you knew how to open the fridge..." So this is my come uppance for not letting her sleep for 3 years... Sorry mum!

We tried what felt like everything!
Playing soothing music, singing lullabies, reading at bed time, low lighting, rocking, figure of 8 rocking, extra naps in the day, dream feeding. We were encorporating each new idea into…